Sawbuck Gamer

They Took Our Candy!

Sweet Revenge

They Took Our Candy! So take it back.

By Matt Kodner • October 29, 2012

Sawbuck Gamer is our daily review of a free or cheap ($10 or less) game.

At the age of 11, I went trick-or-treating with a friend who brought along his much cooler buddies. At the end of the night, all of my new friends ate my candy while I was in the bathroom. So I ran home and stole as much of my sister’s candy as I could, sobbing all the way through. Every October I think back to that night, and wish I could redo everything.

They Took Our Candy! offers that second chance, the opportunity for revenge. It replays that same basic scenario of my youth, but with evil aliens in the role of the cool kids. Hell-bent on ruining Halloween, the aliens nonchalantly swoop down in their flying saucers, beam up the candy, and take off. By assembling a ragtag group of super-powered trick-or-treaters—ninjas, fairy princess, and what have you—the candy can be reclaimed. In a two-by-two formation, your team trudges ever forward, shooting the aliens dead, and gathering their candy to buy upgrades in the standard pillage-and-purchase cycle. While the cartoonish animations may suggest otherwise, this is serious business—the business of justice. “Trick-or-treat!” becomes a war cry.

Candy doesn’t leave a lasting impression. It’s fun while it lasts, and that’s it. Tackling all 13 waves of enemies is a daunting but doable feat. Completionism has never been integral to trick-or-treating, though. If you can’t hit up every house in your neighborhood, you can still end the night with a veritable bounty of fun-sized chocolates (even if there are a few Necco Wafers among the lot). Just so long as you run with the right crew.

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23 Responses to “Sweet Revenge”

  1. Damn Matt. You’re friends really sucked.

    A few days after Halloween when our candy sacks were still fat with chocolate and sugar, my brothers and I would “Make it Rain”  by throwing all of our leftover candy in the air and letting the other brothers scramble  to pick up the pieces. I think we watched too much Ducktales…

    • Enkidum says:

      Seriously, that is a depressing story. Plus, they must have eaten really fast.

      • Girard says:

         One can only hope they got sick to their stomachs afterward.

        The only thing that would have made it sadder would have been if Matt had been the only one in a costume, and if all the cool kids had just shown up in cool kid clothes because they were too old for that stuff.

  2. PhilWal0 says:

    Little bit off-topic, but are all the Gameological writers and plush dolls OK and hiding from the big bad storm? I hope there’ll be bubble tea in the future.

    • John Teti says:

      Most of us are in the thick of it, and posting will likely be a little thinner over the next couple of days. That said, I’ve checked in with most of the other New York staff today, and it sounds like everyone’s found a safe place to weather the storm! Very kind of you to ask.

  3. Army_Of_Fun says:

    When I was in 4th grade, I went Trick-Or-Treating with my Japanese friend Ryo (pronounced De-Oh). His costume consisted of his normal clothes and a werewolf mask that had blinking red lights for eyes. Roughly half way through, his mom tracked him down in her mini-van and picked him up to do something that wasn’t trick-or-treating with me. I would have to finish that night on my own.

    I was on the final leg of my route, just about to cross the street back to my neighborhood. My plan was to hit 5 or so houses and call it a decent, if lonely, night. All of a sudden a car stopped in front of me. I felt my loot packed pillow sack suddenly multiply its hefty weight as a group of 3 teens ran by. I realized that one of them was trying to undo all that my tired feet and I had earned that evening. I held on with all of my pre-teen strength and some borrowed from the Ninja spirit imbued by my costume. Though maybe I was dressed as the Headless Horseman that year? Fortunately the teens must’ve already mugged a few poor souls. They were in a rush to leave the scene of their crime, hopped in their car and sped off.

    The candy was both bitter and sweet that year my friends. The night didn’t go according to plan, but I earned my haul that Halloween. I earned my right to every goddamn roll of Sweettarts. Seriously, why so many Sweettarts!? Bullshit.

    • Enkidum says:

      When I was about the same age, I went out later than usual with a few friends, and I remember when we got close to the local ski hill there was a cop car driving extremely slowly and erratically down the road. This was pretty unusual, as there wasn’t a police station in maybe 20 miles (I grew up in a small town – village, really). The next day I found out that someone had stolen a cop car from the nearest police station, and later driven it on to our local hundred-year-old wooden covered bridge and set it on fire, burning the bridge down.

      The only remote connection this story has to anything here is that it happened on Halloween. The end.

    • PaganPoet says:

      I love Sweettarts. I used to seperate them out from the rest of my loot so I could ration them.

  4. boardgameguy says:

    a potential game for sawbuck gamer review: typing karaoke (http://www.typingkaraoke.com/)

  5. WorldCivilizations says:

    I have a comment about the game! Try 4 cats (I think you have to unlock the cat). I lost on the last level, but it’s a pretty great set up.

  6. Brainstrain says:

    It’s just too slow-paced for this kind of replay-based progression. It’s nice, though.

  7. hubrisofsatan says:

    4 ninjas. So easy.