Out This Week is a roundup of new games that are out this week. These listings don’t constitute an endorsement or a review of any sort. We also don’t pretend that this is an exhaustive list. If there’s a game on the horizon that interests you, share it in the comments.
Paper Mario: Sticker Star
Nintendo 3DS—November 11
Mario, especially in his flat incarnation, is not content to be a mere “Sticker Guy-About-Town.” No, he must be the star, and this game reinforces that by requiring you to obsessively collect stickers until you’re a regular Mae Li Kwan (the person who holds the world record for largest sticker collection, as everyone knows). But what about Luigi? I’m sure he contributed a few along the way, right? Perhaps of the “ghost mansion” variety? No, this is all Mario, all the time. Is there a sticker for “Biggest Ego”?
The Hip Hop Dance Experience
Wii, Xbox 360—November 13
This is just like what real hip-hop dancers experience: Holding wands, alone in their apartments. And no, that’s not a euphemism, despite the inclusion of R. Kelly’s “Ignition (Remix).”
Call Of Duty: Black Ops II
PC, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360—November 13; Wii U—November 18
This is the first Call Of Duty title to take place (partly) in the future. It’s the year 2025, and China is at war with the United States because they won’t share any of their “rare earth elements” with us. Given how things are looking now, I’m assuming those “rare earth elements” include fresh water and government-rationed oxygen packets. Boom! You just got served with a reality check! This is me spinning my wheels because the overt military pageantry of Call Of Duty terrifies me. Bring on the stickers, I say.
Lego The Lord Of The Rings: The Video Game
PC, PlayStation 3, Wii, Xbox 360—November 13
I heard the slogan for this adorable retelling of the Peter Jackson movies is, “One 2-by-4 yellow block stuck to another 2-by-4 yellow block that simply refuses to be pulled apart, even though you’ve been trying for a few hours and have wedged your fingernail between them to no avail, to rule them all.”