Sawbuck Gamer

Temple Run 2

Idol Pleasures

Temple Run 2 puts your primate-fleeing cardio to the test.

By Adam Volk • January 25, 2013

Sawbuck Gamer is our daily review of a free or cheap ($10 or less) game.

Physical fitness is important. Just ask Olivia Newton John—or Guy Dangerous, the perpetually running protagonist of Temple Run 2. Like the original Temple Run, it’s your job to help Guy snag a golden idol and then escape from an irate demon monkey who wants nothing more than to turn you into its own personal hand puppet. To make the long-distance dash to freedom, you jump, slide, and turn to avoid obstacles both banal, like a stray tree root, and epic, like a freefall into the sky.

It’s a simple formula but one that still holds up, challenging you to beat your distance and time scores. With each death, you’ll start back at the beginning—unless, of course, you’re willing to shell out some real-world bucks to purchase gems. The gems let you continue your run and help put the designers’ kids through college.

Temple 2 doesn’t seek to reinvent the wheel, and aside from some slick new visuals, it’s really just more addictive on-rails running, offering couch-potato players the chance to work on their cardio via proxy.

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16 Responses to “Idol Pleasures”

  1. GaryX says:

    UGH. Adam, you are so biased. CLEARLY you don’t understand the intricacies of the game. I’m SORRY it was too difficult for you APPARENTLY! I find this review to be quite off the mark, and I encourage anyone to read some other REAL sites or try it for themselves because I’m having a lot of fun with it!!!

    (Sorry, I just thought this website could use more normal video game website comments. Spice it up.)

    • Canadian gamer says:

      Man you’re an Apple fanboy obviously you are sold out go back to your COD drug I’ve had enough of people like you. Since I have sex with your mom every day I may as well be your father. 

      Geez, that almost sounded like a typical reply on an IGN comment board. Except it was rather hard to write.

    • Cheese says:

      Also, based on that screenshot, Adam CLEARLY doesn’t know how to collect coins. Lrn 2 play nub!

    • Girard says:

      Be sure to pop on over the Rachel Bloom interview and call her a “fake geek girl” for not playing enough video games. 

      Bonus points if you manage to denigrate her physical appearance – EXTRA BONUS POINTS if you compliment her physical appearance in a way that is even more insulting and depressing than the denigration would have been.

      Someone with more free time than me should probably start a “reposted Kotaku comments” account.

      • Jackbert322 says:

        Hmmm…I mean, I am a 14 year old who spends my days playing Halo and leveling up thanks to DOUBLE XP MOUNTAIN DEW, so I’ve got plenty of free time…it’ll interfere with editing my Linkin Park (with quickscopes accentuated by dubstep) highlight videos though…

      • Spacemonkey Mafia says:

        Go to yesterday’s recap of the furry convention and you’ll have the ammunition to last a lifetime.

      • Fyodor Douchetoevsky says:

        No no no. please god no. noooooooooo. 

        Don’t even joke about stuff like that. 

      • Fluka says:

        *Pops over to kotaku for the first time in weeks to find some choice awful comments.*

        *Returns empty handed.*

        Kill all humans.

    • Effigy_Power says:

      -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- you -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- from my -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted-. And then your -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- ketchup in your -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted-!!! -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted- radio antenna of -expletive deleted- -expletive deleted-!

    • Goon Diapers says:

      I nEvEr played this game but it is the WoRsT game I eVeR played.

      aLtErNaTiNg CaPs!

  2. Cheese says:

    It’s a fun little game. I picked this and Super Hexagon up a couple days ago (finally out on Android!) and between those I’m set on phone games for, like, the rest of my life. I pretty much only play on trains or boring meetings where no one can see my phone.

  3. PaganPoet says:

    Speaking of Olivia Newton John and shamelessly plugging Kylie Minogue every chance I can get, I always liked her cover of Physical:

    Makes me want to writhe around on some silk sheets.

  4. fieldafar says:

    Imangi have done a great job on the Android port, TR2 runs much more smoothly on my phone compared to the first one.

  5. Aaron Riccio says:

    I prefer my on-rails running to have more variety! Runner2 comes out this week.