Sawbuck Gamer

Rise Of The Blobs

Jiggle It (Just A Little Bit)

Rise Of The Blobs is a battle against sentient gelatin. Cosby’s worst nightmare?

By Derrick Sanskrit • February 21, 2013

Sawbuck Gamer is our daily review of a free or cheap game ($10 or less).
Rise Of The Blobs
Creator: Robot Invader
Platforms: Android, iPhone/iPad (Universal)
Reviewed on: Android
Price: Free

It must be so hard being an anthropomorphic marshmallow. You could be stretched and kneaded into taffy, boiled alive in a cup of cocoa, or set aflame over a campfire for s’mores. These deaths, while deliciously horrible, are at least expedient. Worse yet would be a fate where you were petrified, a witness to the candy holocaust surrounding you, yet contained away from it, left to await your own digestive end. Something like, say, being trapped in a cube of fruit-flavored gelatin, floating frictionless in your own private artificially-sweetened jiggly doom.

This is what approximates a story in Rise Of The Blobs, a falling-block puzzle game. Players rotate a platform of gelatin cubes while a rather freaked-out marshmallow-with-a-face tosses fruit bombs from the top. Drop a fruit into the gelatin of the same color to stuff the blob, and then you can destroy the blob with a poke taking out nearby blobs of the same flavor. The gel blobs, as the title suggests, rise in endless waves that would intimidate even the Bill Cosby-est of gelatin enthusiasts. If a blob reaches the top of the tower, it swallows your marshmallow pal in a scrumptious annihilation. If a fruit bomb reaches the top, well, it explodes, which isn’t good for marshmallows either. Delectable destruction is every marshmallow’s birthright, though. (Have you ever seen a stale marshmallow? Not appealing.) So the best you can do is prolong the sentence for as long as you’re able. Life is short, though, so don’t forget to eat your dessert soon and often.

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  • boardgameguy

    stale marshmallows are delicious.  that is all.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579674289 Morgan Filbert

    My Grandmother once found a half-bag of Marshmallows that was 30 years old in her pantry. In an effort to see how hard they were, and make my sister and I laugh, she spun it over her head and brought it down on the counter. I still remember the chips of plastic resin flying off in every direction.

    Those suckers become rocks.