Feature

The Art Of Syrian Games

A graphical treasury of WTF.

By John Teti • February 6, 2013

In his exploration of the hacked PlayStation games on sale at a Nairobi shopping center, Joe Keiser characterized pirate-game publisher Syrian Games as “video game cover artists of great vision and poise.” That only begins to describe the treasures that have emerged from the Syrian Games Photoshop lab. (If you haven’t read Joe’s report yet, you should start there and then come back for more amazement. It’s worth it, trust me.)

The library of game covers in the company’s online back catalog is a nearly bottomless well of delight. The Syrian Games image-manipulation maestro seems to have hit his or her peak during the heyday of the PlayStation and PlayStation 2. The covers for those systems’ pirated games—which number in the thousands—demonstrate a well-considered lunacy, a dadaist disregard for the conventions of the source material. (The covers for most of the company’s Xbox and Wii ripoffs, on the other hand, simply steal the art from the original game, part and parcel. How trite!)

We know little about Syrian Games. The description on their “About Us” page is a single word. Their contact page lists their location as Damascus—the capital city, currently in paralysis and acting as president Bashar Assad’s stronghold in the Syrian civil war. Given the all-consuming viciousness of the war, it’s hard to imagine that Syrian Games is a going concern right now. But we genuinely hope that the people responsible for these bizarre images are doing okay, because their work is hilarious.

Although the aesthetic varies wildly, you can discern fragments of an artistic style running through the covers. There’s a fondness for rainbows, for instance, and a strong predilection for tropical backdrops with sunny blue skies (even when the title explicitly calls for darkness). But other touches are perplexingly isolated. On the Hitman cover, why does Agent 47 have a heart tattoo? Why is Snoopy a panda in one version of Snoopy: The Red Baron’s cover—and why make two versions? Since when is Jim Carrey’s character from The Mask a superhero?

We’ve selected a few of our favorite covers for the gallery you see below. We could have included hundreds more. The images are presented without further comment because honestly, what can you say?

007: From Russia With Love

Alone In The Dark

Backyard Wrestling: Don’t Try This At Home

Batman Collection

Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Bust-A-Groove

Carmen Sandiego: The Secret Of The Stolen Drums

Dr. Seuss’ The Cat In The Hat

Egypt 2: The Heliopolis Prophecy

FIFA Street 2

Final Fantasy VI

Free Running

Ghost Rider

GoldenEye: Rogue Agent

GoldenEye: Rogue Agent (alternate)

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

Grand Theft Auto: 3 In 1

Grand Theft Auto: Goran Inzibat

Grand Theft Auto: Hussein Al Jasmi

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas: Super Heroes

Grand Theft Auto: ???

HBO Boxing

Hitman 3

Ico

Jackie Chan

Jump Start Wildlife Safari Field Trip

Keiko Yukawa Professional Billiard

L’Amerzone

Made Man

Masters Of The Universe: He-Man

Men In Black

Mercenaries

Miami Vice

Monkey Magic

Pepsi Man

Pepsi Man (alternate)

RoboCop

The Sims 2: Castaway

Snoopy: The Red Baron

Snoopy: The Red Baron (alternate)

Spy Fiction

Star Phantasy Universe

Shining Force EXA

Star Trek Invasion

Summer Athletics

Tomb Raider: Underworld

Tony Hawk’s Underground 2

Trigger Man

Trigger Man (alternate)

WWII Soldier

Zero Pilot

Write a scintillating comment

PaganPoet

You have to love RoboCop’s rainbow-making jetpack. Where can I get one of those?

And how menacing is that “About Us” page? “soon.” Soon? Soon what?! OH GOD TELL ME!!!
- Cloks
  
  THE ABOUT US PAGE IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU
  - PaganPoet
    
    They should at least let me know if I should have evening wear handy, or if it’s okay if I’m still in shorts and flipflops.
- George_Liquor
  
  God help me, I heard distant ululation when I saw that “soon.”
  - Spacemonkey Mafia
    
    That was just Spongebob from the San Andreas cover.
    - Raging Bear
      
      The Spongebob one. That was when my mind broke.
    - WaxTom
      
      I’m in my college library just bouncing up and down like an idiot trying to hold the laughs in.
- Bad Horse
  
  I would play the shit out of M-rated Carmen Sandiego.
- zebbart
  
  It’s just mom.
  http://www.theonion.com/articles/creepy-oneword-text-message-from-mom-could-mean-an,31096/
Drew Toal

After Tony Stark went broke, he was forced to turn to NASCAR-style advertising. Sad.
- HobbesMkii
  
  Hey, at least he didn’t go with GoDaddy for a sponsor.
  - Destroy Him My Robots
    
    DANICA PATRICK HAS GONE ALL-STAR
Cloks

I like to believe that what they’re representing here aren’t products per say but the direction they believe the video games industry will take as a whole. Every game becomes a rehash of existing properties to tie into established markets? Check. Games are only made for systems with a significant installed user-base regardless of console age? Check. The concept of “video game” becomes a floating, mystical squid that deigns to delight us with psychotropic tentacles delivering a vision of “video game” beyond what those of us on the Mortal Plane could experience? Check. Alternate box-art for games depending on venue it was released at? Check.
- http://twitter.com/tapirman Kyle O’Reilly
  
  I would support a video game industry that gives me a different Grand Theft Auto game for every obscure Saudi Arabian musician.
- Tarek Jarkas
  
  i doubt there where lots of deep meanings to the covers
  i remember living in syria as a kid and seeing those games in the stores
  i never met the programmer who hacked the games, but i can assure you he has a very very good imagination
  besides there in syria people have no idea about the video game industry and there copyrights, any game in syria is a pirated version and costs about half a dollar
vinnybushes

I think the Hitman games would have been a lot more interesting if you could only wear long sleeves or risk being identified by your adorable tattoo. Try assassinating someone in Rio now.
Spacemonkey Mafia

Where to even begin? Each one of these is just spilling over with visual information, they could, every one, be a thesis topic.
Borges wrote the most insidious labyrinth could be a single straight line, but Borges went blind and died before he could see the cover of “Grand Theft Auto San Andreas Super Heroes”. You get lost in that and you’re never getting out.
Of all of them, though there is an almost zen beauty in the “Zero Pilot” cover. No rainbows, no nonsensical pop-culture appropriations, no hasty Photoshopping. Just a photo of a plane. With zero pilot in sight.
- Drew Toal
  
  Topical!
- Drew Toal
  
  Also, speaking of zero pilots, I used to play this game Wings of Fury that was pretty excellent. I’m gonna go see if I can find it on the old Internet.
  - http://www.facebook.com/mjbrady Matthew J. Brady
    
    Wings of Fury was awesome. You could bomb the hell out of those little island houses then strafe the guys that came running out, and I always loved torpedoing ships. Dogfights usually sucked though, but I figured out how to cheat by climbing up as high as possible, then diving back down to just above the tree line, and the other planes would always come down in front of me. Suckers!
Citric

If the upcoming Robocop doesn’t involve him farting rainbows, I will be very disappointed.

I also appreciate the Star Trek cover designed seemingly to anger Star Trek AND Star Wars fans.
- Spacemonkey Mafia
  
  Well goodness knows angering either is about as difficult as bullseye-ing a Tribble with your T-16.
  - Bad Horse
    
    That sounds impossible, even for a computer!
  - Aurora Boreanaz
    
    Threepio! Shut down all garbage smashers on decks 5 through 9, and reroute main power to the shields!
- Fluka
  
  But seriously folks, what’s up with pirated Robocop and rainbows? Both the Kenyans and the Syrians seem to be in on this… Is the rainbow a PS2 thing? Did the Syrian guy pirate the Kenyan guy, or vice versa? Is this some kind of Jungian archetype? I have so many questions!
  - Mike Ferraro
    
    What you’ve never googled Robocop Unicorn? http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kotax3rlj41qzkyyko1_500.jpg
  - Mistah Chrysoprase
    
    I’m noticing most of these follow the same louder-is-better approach to packaging. Presumably the inestimable mechanoid policeman’s signature monochrome look just wasn’t eyeball-searing enough even with the brightness blown out, so in came the rainbows and magic castles.
    That or, it’s a reskin of an old Barbie game.
    I REALLY hope it’s the second one.
- Electric Dragon
  
  Somebody should send a copy to JJ Abrams.
Citric

While these selections are a bounty of joy, do NOT forget to go to the site itself, which features cover art for Alundra 2, that has Captain America on it. And only Captain America on it.
- http://gameological.com/author/johnteti/ John Teti
  
  Seriously. The Syrian Games site has so, so much more.
  - Citric
    
    I think the cover people were just given a title and no other indication of what the game was about, because I’m pretty sure Ultimate Bass Challenge is about fishing, not guitars. I’m also beginning to think that’s the way to do all covers.
  - vinnybushes
    
    My computer is probably getting so many viruses on it right now and I could not care less.
  - George_Liquor
    
    I love that their Guitar Hero: Aerosmith has Ace Frehley on the cover.
  - vinnybushes
    
    I actually think this box art perfectly captures Altered Beast, because, if we’re being real here, I mostly remember turning into a reject from “Pumping Iron”. Extra points to the alternate box art obviously cribbed from a Wolverine game. http://syriangames.com/index.php?route=product/product&path=18_46&product_id=2913
  - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579674289 Morgan Filbert
    
    Avatar the Last Air Bender: Into the Inferno. Just a screen shot from James Cameron’s Avatar, because what else could it be, honestly?
George_Liquor

Honestly, the art for uhh… “Bust-A-Groove” is still better than the bloody bubble-blowing baby on the cover of Super Bust-A-Move.
- Fluka
  
  Oh god! That poor man has become unstuck in space-time, and his body is being shredded by a quantum singularity!
  - George_Liquor
    
    I’ll still take that over bloody baby spit-up.
    - Fluka
      
      *googles*
      
      !!! Equally terrifying!
- Mike Ferraro
  
  The NBA Street cover looks way better than the photoshop disaster that is the REAL cover of EA’s March Madness 2003. http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51AG4CVZ61L._SL500_AA300_.jpg
- tedthefed
  
  I find the Bust-A-Groove one kind of gorgeous.
vinnybushes

Is Coolmen Pepsi in direct competition with Dr. Pepper 10? My testosterone fueled psyche is so confused now.
Citric

Oh god, Apocalypse is Bruce Willis’ head crudely photoshopped into some anime.
http://www.avclub.com/users/merve,96925/ Merve

You have no idea how sad I am that Carmen Sandiego: The Secret Of The Stolen Drums is not a real game.
PugsMalone

This won’t mean much to the non-anime fans here, but their cover for Persona 2 uses fan art of the characters as the cast from K-ON!

http://syriangames.com/index.php?route=product/product&path=62&product_id=2076

EDIT: Oh God, look at “Incredible Crisis”.

http://syriangames.com/index.php?route=product/product&path=62&product_id=2025
- Mistah Chrysoprase
  
  See, now, I would buy the shit out of a legit FF7 tactics game. This is where Squeenix is at now I guess, outshone by their own pirates.
  - http://www.gildedgreen.com/ Girard
    
    I recall the very first one had a few cameos from FF7 characters, but, yeah, that’s the only bone they’ve thrown in that regard.
    
    I imagine a Namco X Capcom-style tactics game mashing together all-stars from the whole series would do SUPER well (they could even include characters from other Square and Enix franchises).
    
    But I guess Square is happy to simply manifest that idea in exploitative mobile games.
    - Mistah Chrysoprase
      
      Well that looks appalling; still I like your idea, they did something like it with Theatrythm so who knows, maybe one day.
- PaganPoet
  
  Heh, not to mention that that’s the cast from Persona 4, not Persona 2…and it’s only the female cast members…and two Yukikos….
Destroy Him My Robots

*looks at Ico*

Whoa! That’s nearly as bad as the US boxart.
- http://www.gildedgreen.com/ Girard
  
  My first thought was “Hey, they managed to improve the US box art!”
fieldafar

I really like how they still gave random ESRB ratings.
- Spacemonkey Mafia
  
  Rated “طبيعتها” for Children 3-7, Russell Crowe with an action-figure head and Batman!
caspiancomic

guys what am i even looking at i cant
- caspiancomic
  
  that wasnt even a disqus error i just dont think my brain
  - Cloks
    
    video game
    - Jackbert322
      
      johnny boy
    - Chum Joely
      
      FANBOY OVER HREE!
    - George_Liquor
      
      Woah there, Hitler.
CNightwing

Apparently Tony Hawk’s Underground is the nickname for his sweatshop fuelled by child labour.
Mercenary_Security_number_4

I’ve always wanted to see Mask team up with Super-M-Tan.
STOP_RIGHT_THERE_CRIMINAL_SCUM

MY SIDES
- Glenn Welsh
  
  Are they splitting with rapturous laughter?
http://blinkinglightsandbleepingnoises.blogspot.co.uk/ The Visible Man

I’m pretty sure that isn’t the real Keiko Yukawa.
http://www.gildedgreen.com/ Girard

Here’s the opening FMV for Carmen Sandiego: The Secret Of The Stolen Drums.
http://pseudonymjones.com/ Pseudonym Jones

Is anyone else here from Philadelphia? Because to me, the Syrian Games “S” logo immediately reads as the SEPTA logo (the South Eastern Pennsylvania Transit Authority): http://www.septa.org/

Although I realize it’s unrealistic that they pirated that, too.
stakkalee

All of these leave me absolutely giddy – I can’t stop giggling. Sara Michelle Gellar’s poorly Photoshopped head, the secret agent who went rogue and became a luchador, the Empire invading the Federation, it’s all so wonderful. I especially love the GTA clones with the local celebrities – Goran Inzibat and Hussein Al Jasmi are both musicians, but the El Lemby 8 Giga one is apparently based on the movie of the same name starring Mohammed Saad, Egypt’s answer to Kevin James. This is the only plot synopsis I could find for El Lemby 8 Giga, but I’m not sure how you shoehorn that in to GTA; SyrianGames.com is, lamentably, silent on the subject.

@JohnTeti:disqus, I seriously hope we’re going to see a couple of reviews of some of these from @JoeKeiser:disqus.
- djsubversive
  
  “the secret agent who went rogue and became a luchador”
  
  Both of those guys are from Saints Row the Third. Like, straight-up ripped off from SRTT. They DID change the color of Killbane’s clothes, though – he usually wears green.
  
  Not that I should have been surprised by that, after all the other “hey, isn’t that…?” covers here.
Cloks

Video Game: Is it Stage Play

Act 1

On stage is darkness, but soon light to see the play with. Man is standing in center of the stage and behind him nothing but darkness, unrelenting void. Projected onto screen now, it is image of Mario.

Man: Video game, video game. What is video game?!

From ceiling of theater it is rain down, hundreds of video game. All kind, from hit like Alone in the Dark to Zero Pilot.

Man: And it is video game. I am to play it.

Man pick up in his hand, yes it is video game. Screen behind him show what is playing, is platformer. Hop and jump action is happen.

Man: I am video game. I am video game. I am best at video game.

From offstage enter other man, wearing fedora.

Fedora: I am video game criticisms. You are not best at video game.

Man: I am best at video game.

Fedora: No you are not. Pay dollar to be best. Seven points out of ten.

Screen switches to the words “OBJECTIVE RATINGS”. It is then picture of sobbing Statue of Liberty.

Curtain is closed.

Act 2

Screen is show word “CONTINUE?”. Underneath appear countdown with numbers from 10 to 1 descending.

Man: Continue.

On screen now is FPS. Man get really rooty tooty point and shooty. Heads are roll. From offstage enter other man, now wearing ten gallon hat.

Ten Gallon: Am violence in games.

Man: I am not shape by anger.

Ten Gallon: Am too.

Man socks ten gallon in jaw. He fall over, crumple like potato sack

Man: I am best at video game.

Curtain is closed.

Act 3

Screen is show word “INDIE GAMES…?”

Man: Conceptually lacking, aesthetically displeasing.

Screen switch to indie game. Man play as retro styled character. Anachronism. Other man enter, now again wearing fedora.

Fedora: Am genius. Video game am make better at life. 11 out of 10.

Both men shed a single tear and embrace. Curtain falls, audience is rapturous applause.

Both Men: The end?
- Electric Dragon
  
  Game by Samuel Beckett, translated from the original Japanese by the guys who did the English version of Zero Wing.
  - PhonyPope
    
    Don’t you mean Zero Pilot?
- Spacemonkey Mafia
  
  I saw the playbill for this. It was Pere Ubu Photoshopped into a Macross Mecha.
Aurora Boreanaz

Two of my favorites are right next to each other:

Masters of the Universe: He-Man, starring Geralt from The Witcher 2!

Men In Black: Men In Pinstripes With Tommy Guns!
http://twitter.com/tapirman Kyle O’Reilly

So somebody here is gonna order some of these 1.00 games and report back to us right? RIGHT!?!?

I need to know if He-Man with Geralt from Witcher 2 is as awesome as the box art promises.

Also, why did they slap the Sega logo on Tony Hawk Underground 2? It’s not like they need to impress anybody by saying something like, “Sega published this one guys. It’s legit.”

I DON”T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING ANYMORE!!!!!
Penis Van Lesbian

I think the Tony Hawk is my favourite – do you actually get to play as a small child who’s just been given his first skateboard?
Electric Dragon

It’s as though there was some kind of Demolition Man-like Franchise War in Kenya: now all games are Grand Theft Auto or Guitar Hero.
http://twitter.com/roundthewheel RTW

After much deliberation I think my favorite is Pepsi Iron Man.

Though that Grand Theft Auto 3-in-1 is a thing of beauty. “You don’t need an automatic assault rifle, Squidward! All you need is—IMAGINATION”
ItsTheShadsy

Bahaha, I totally lost it with WWII Soldier.
ferrarimanf355

The US cover for ICO is still worse than the pirate cover.
http://twitter.com/djbeema Reuben

The cat in the hat looks like Ken Leung
- http://www.facebook.com/people/Kevin-Johnson/501651 Kevin Johnson
  
  That’s the one that got me. Not sure why, I think it’s because that’s some 4chan-like PS skills right there. THAT LOOK.
  
  Also, the first Snoopy head is actually ‘shopped on the character of Bolt from the movie Bolt. It’s kind of clever, in an inexplicable way.
djsubversive

That first San Andreas cover just made me sad that we didn’t get Cesar Vialpando as the protagonist for that game.

Then the next one had Sonic, Mario, and Spongebob behind Cesar, and I dropped back into “confused but amused.”
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579674289 Morgan Filbert

So I’m curious Joe, are these games Region 1 or region free? If so I think I’ve just found about ten years worth of gag gifts.
Nadia K

Honestly, the Free Running/Mirror’s Edge one isn’t even that bad. I applaud them for that.

But man, that Pepsi-Iron Man one. I couldn’t stop laughing.
ComradePig

This website is truly a goldmine and I feel obligated to link this amazing gem of a GTA variant:

http://syriangames.com/image/cache/data/banner/ps2%20A/3319-225×300.gif
- TaumpyTearrs
  
  Awww, everybody else looking at these has exceeded their sites bandwidth, so now I can’t look.
http://twitter.com/ROBO_LEADER Craig H

“Zero Pilot” indeed!
Glenn Welsh

Well at least you can’t accuse Zero Pilot’s cover of false advertising. If you look closely, you’ll notice there are, in fact, zero pilots on that plane. And I like that there is just a game called “Jackie Chan”, since actually being Jackie Chan must be very much like a video game.
http://www.facebook.com/andy.tuttle.79 Andy Tuttle

I just thought you’d all like to know that the Gameological Society commentors have broken the Syrian games website. It currently has a splash page up that says “Bandwidth Exceeded”. Way to go us!
Carísimo Rolex

La mejor portada la del GTA con el moro cantando con un huquelele. XD XD XD
Halloween_Jack

Batman: Come At Me, Bro

Dr. Seuss’ Stephen King Goes To A Rave

Pepsi Man: Hey, Even Tony Stark Has Cash Flow Problems Occasionally

Star Trek: Solving That Stupid Star Destroyer Vs. Enterprise-D Question Once And For All

Tony Hawk’s Underground 2: Goddamnit Mom I Asked For An XBox
http://twitter.com/mad_maw Chris Glover

There should totally be a game jam where you have to implement a game to fit the box art of one of these
Mike Filak

One word…hilarious @ l77t Robocop lol
http://www.facebook.com/RialVestro James Robbert Hermes

“Since when is Jim Carrey’s character from The Mask a superhero?”

The Mask was created by Dark Horse Comics, he’s ALWAYS been a super hero. He even says “With these powers I could be… A SUPER HERO!” in the movie. Whoever wrote that is not only clueless about the comics but has obviously never even seen the movie.
- http://robcypher.blogspot.com/ Rob Cypher
  
  I thought he was a crazy-faced killer in the comics; the movie was something totally different. You sure you’ve read the comics (pre-movie ones, anyway)?
GH56734

Found This:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3eNToC7AAM
avon43

ZERO PILOT: the only flight simulator where you play as a plane that just sits in an air feld doing nothing.

GOTY
http://www.facebook.com/elultimo.hombrelibre Elultimo Hombrelibre

The rainbow was also present in 8 bits games to show these games where not black and gray, but include colours. Maybe is a reference to that: not-monocrome games. Imagine a world where 16 colorus is a luxury.

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