Sawbuck Gamer


Noggin On Heaven’s Door

Lazerman proves that one head is better than none.

By Jason Reich • March 18, 2013

Sawbuck Gamer is our daily review of a free or cheap game ($10 or less).

Lazerman opens with a closeup of our eponymous hero’s face, wearing a helmet that makes him looks suspiciously like another familiar Man of the Mega variety. His cheeks are gaunt, his expression weary. His ice-blue eyes stare out at the player, distant yet at the same time burning with years of accumulated wisdom. Oh, Lazerman, the things you’ve seen. What have they done to you?

Whatever it is, it’s not good. Lazerman begins the game by bursting from the tank where his disembodied head floats in suspended animation, on a quest to restore the rest of his robotic body. Luckily, Lazerman has a laser melon, capable of smashing through walls, lab equipment, and the occasional scientist’s chest cavity. He can also transform into a wispy particle of light, allowing him to sneak past enemies undetected, though fine motor control is not Lazerman’s strong suit. It’s much more fun to let him ping-pong wildly around in a flurry of carnage, activating special abilities for extended combos of destruction. Later levels throw in new traps and boss fights to keep things interesting, and despite its generic setting, Lazerman is filled with personality. Being decapitated was never such a pleasure.

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One Response to “Noggin On Heaven’s Door”

  1. Oxperiment says:

    That was a good time, and it’s not badly designed, but I could really get behind some better controls. I know that focusing on a single “push” to interact with a game is in vogue, especially with the app lottery in full swing. But come on- if you’ve made a browser game, then I have more than a single mouse button to work with. It wouldn’t break the game if I could be a little more precise.