The Gameological Questionnaire

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You Asked, They’ll Answer

Here are the questions for next week’s Gameological Questionnaire at E3.

By John Teti • June 7, 2013

On Monday, we asked you to pitch questions for The Gameological Questionnaire—a list of questions we’ll pose to developers on the E3 show floor next week. You came through, and we’ve made our selections. There were a lot of excellent questions, and it was tough to narrow down the list. Some of my favorite questions ultimately had to be cut because they might not apply to every developer, or because they were too complex for the rapid-fire style. So if you weren’t chosen, don’t take it personally. You can still consider yourself an incisive, inquisitive genius. Here are our picks. The questions have been lightly edited for clarity and concision.

AngryRaisins asks, “If your game had a super-deluxe version that cost $1,000, what would be in the box?”

Citric asks, “Sony and Microsoft have new consoles coming soon. What exciting new things can you do on those machines, in terms of game design, that you couldn’t do before?”

Ted Kindig asks, “If an alien species discovered your game as the only remnant of human civilization, what would they learn about us?”

Flyonysus asks, “What wine pairs best with your game?”

Merve asks, “What’s the weirdest idea that came up during production but didn’t ultimately make it into the game?”

All of these commenters will receive a Gameological pin, and the randomly selected winner of the BioShock Infinite “Murder Of Crows” vigor is AngryRaisins! Congratulations to all. Please email me, john [at-symbol] gameological [dot] com, with your mailing address so that we can send you your prizes.

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45 Responses to “You Asked, They’ll Answer”

  1. Chalkdust says:

    Appropriately, I feel that if there were a $1000 edition of Bioshock Infinite, it would include a set of Vigor bottles.

  2. PaganPoet says:

    Congrats to the weiners. *rah rah rah* I still want to buy a GS pin.

  3. Spacemonkey Mafia says:

    Damn.  Without an official vigor prop, I guess I’ll have to settle for the half-empty bottle of Limoncello in a novelty Leaning Tower of Pisa bottle we took from my grandma’s home after she passed.
       Drinking it gives me the power to really enjoy the first half of Strictly Ballroom, then getting ill and having to go to bed.
       Congratulations to the erudite winners.

    • Effigy_Power says:

      I have a bottle of Diet Dr Pepper in my car that’s been there for a week and the sun is hitting it pretty well. I can’t promise super-powers, but it might replicate a Vigor’s side effects.

  4. Merve says:

    It’s hilariously fitting that @Flyonysus:disqus would ask about wine.

  5. I kinda wish you sent out the Charge Vigor, because, like everyone else who played Bioshock Infinite, it would quietly sit somewhere, untouched and utterly ignored.

    • Merve says:

      I used the Charge Vigor a lot, actually. But that’s because I like to play video games as a suicidal madman.

    • Effigy_Power says:

      Was the flamey bottle with the hot devil girl too much to ask, Gameological? I really would have loved to not be able to win that one… ^,..,^

    • BROedipus says:

      I actually used the charge vigor more than just about any other. Paired with a shotgun and those pants that make enemies take increased damage after being struck with the skyhook (an impressive benefit I never noticed before while wearing pants) it was off the hook!
      The hook!
      The SKYhook!
      Get it? Guys?
      …I’m sorry.

  6. The_Helmaroc_King says:

    Oh no! You’ve crushed my mildest dreams!

    Can I at least get a decoder ring?

  7. Ryan Smith says:

    As one of the reporters having to ask these above questions to developers, I just want to thank you all for not making me inquire about porn, polygons or Pokemon-all things I’d be mildly uncomfortable with.

    • boardgameguy says:

      i was so close to putting forward a pokemon question. missed opportunities all around.

    • Citric says:

      “If you had to make a fully 3D sex scene between Pokemon, which ones would you choose? Pick as many as you like.”

    • Effigy_Power says:

      Next year, Smith… that “My Little Pony BDSM Basement Sim” is just waiting for a publisher.

    • Sleverin says:

       You could always go for the classic, “When is the next iteration of Gundam coming out?  Why hasn’t this version of Gundam come out?”  Now THAT’S something that’ll piss off anyone who has been asked that question a million times.  Everyone else will just be like, “The fuck?  Why are you asking me about Youtube parodies of some Korean song?”

  8. beema says:

    Hey Raisins, once you get that vigor, can I hire you to… take care of some people for me?

  9. Mike says:

    The second question is the one I’m most interested in. Are we going to be exploring game spaces in new ways, or just exploring prettier game spaces in the same old ways?

    • 2StoryOuthouse says:

       I agree, but it’s also a question that I could see a developer not really understanding or answering. You ask about game design and they say, “Look how lifelike this dog is!”

      • Mike says:

        Y’know, this makes me think that whatever the shortcomings with Nintendo hardware may be (and whatever limitations their first-party focused development strategy has), that kind of response would be unfathomable from someone like Miyamoto or one of the other main Nintendo developers. Obviously indie developers wouldn’t say it either, but they’re not riding the difference between art and commerce the way an industry giant like Nintendo is.

  10. Citric says:

    Hooray I contributed something to something.

  11. George_Liquor says:

    Hey, who on the staff is going to E3 this year? Anyone going for the first time?

    • John Teti says:

      Matt Gerardi, Ryan Smith, and Anthony John Agnello will be at the show. It’s Matt’s first time at E3.

      • Effigy_Power says:

        I hope they’re gentle. (They’re not!)

      • George_Liquor says:

        So Joystick Master Pete Strackmeyer is a no-show this year? Darn, I was really looking forward to his thoughts on the upcoming line of fully-transistorized videographical mirth-enhancement stations. 

        • Effigy_Power says:

          That does seem like a wasted opportunity. I would have had a ton of new appreciation for the cut of Teti’s jib if he would have done a Strackmeier in the middle of E3.

        • George_Liquor says:

          @Effigy_Power:disqus I know, right? If anyone’s got the chops to deliver us a fantastic E3, it’s John & Pete.

          “Your Joystick Master is here live at the Umpteenth Annual E-E-E expo, and we in the gaming ‘biz’ as the kids call it, are eagerly awaiting the imminent reveal of Sony’s new Piss-4 Computer Brain!”

    • Ryan Smith says:

      I think this is my 5th E3 in the last 8 years, which makes me feel like the Tim Duncan of video game journalists.

      • Effigy_Power says:

        Too bad you can’t mathematically become the “Seven of Nine of video game journalists”… The nerd-o-sphere would have been abuzz with joy. :)

  12. vinnybushes says:

    Aw, I already had plans to take the vigor and my camera to a nearby park and terrorize some crows…

  13. Flyonysus says:

    Awww shucks.