Sawbuck Gamer

Jaws: The Text Adventure

Hunger Games

In Jaws: The Text Adventure, everyone’s least favorite Great White tells its side of the story.

By Drew Toal • October 3, 2013

Sawbuck Gamer is our daily review of a free or cheap game ($10 or less).

Text adventures haven’t been very popular since the days of Jaws, so it’s fitting that Steven Spielberg’s psychotic Great White gets to be the protagonist in this throwback sea yarn. The commands are simple—pick a direction, and try to eat whatever you come across. There are some familiar dangers to this mostly unstoppable eating machine, and not all external: “You swim slowly through the night,” the text reads, “contemplating the solitary brutality of your existence as an apex predator.” Trying to eat a buoy hurts your teeth and causes you to wonder if inanimate floating objects have feelings.

Mostly, Jaws must deal with angry humans trying to put him on a strictly non-human diet. Each thing you eat, be it a dog, the police chief’s son, or bait, fills the shark’s stomach up by a small percentage. As Jaws’ stomach and inventory fill up (yes, you have an inventory, which is filled with things like “dozens of serrated teeth” and “lifeless black eyes”), events build to a familiar climax. Will your enemy Chief Brody prevail, or will your terrible hunger finally be sated?

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11 Responses to “Hunger Games”

  1. Cloks says:

    I played this a week or so ago and was really happy that I had finally seen Jaws this summer. A local theater does special presentations where Fritz the Nite Owl, an old television personality, will interrupt the films with trivia about the making of and impact of the movie. These shorts are great because he’s digitally edited into the movie and appeared in Jaws as the skeleton coming out of the boat, Quint, a beach-goer and a few others.

    Anyway, I think it’s interesting to play as the titular shark because it reveals just how simple your motivations are. Jaws isn’t some monster purposely eating children and beach babes, he’s just a shark trying to get a meal.

  2. GaryX says:

    This should have been Grendel in Jaws/video game form.

  3. Fluka says:

    I liked the part where I destroyed the entire world.

    • Passe_Partout says:

       I think that at least one of the JAWS sequels would’ve received much more acclaim if it had ended with a nuclear shark.

      • Fluka says:

        This game is canon.

        • Passe_Partout says:

           Does Spielberg know about this? I think everyone is aware of the fate of the Atari E.T. game after the creators decided that an extendable neck and deep pits were an overlooked part of the E.T. canon.

        • SamPlays says:

          I saw what you did there:

          “This game is [going to be destroyed by my] canon.”

  4. George_Liquor says:

    We’re gonna need a bigger terminal.

  5. NakedSnake says:

    The fair wind blew, the white foam flew, the furrow followed free.
    We were the first that ever burst into that silent sea.

  6. Aurora Boreanaz says:

    X-COM SALE ALERT – Sorry to post off-topic here, but Steam has the latest X-Com game on sale right now for $10.  Get it while it’s cheap!

    I have added it to my huge backlog for future play, along with this week’s Humble Weekly Sale bundle.